Wondering
by Taylaaa
Summary: An empty common room. A curious Sirius. A questioning Lily. Rated for content, and safety. Oneshot.


**Disclaimer: I don't own this magnificent world. Just the plot.**

**Author's Note: Eh, a bit of late-night writing. The idea came to me, but it didn't exactly turn out the way I wanted it to... oh well. R&R still, please(:**

"Tell me, Remus, do you find it strange to wonder about things?" Sirius Black sat, legs crossed loosly, expression mystically curious, on the couch that stood across the fireplace. His long, bony fingers worked through his hair, his lower lip disappeared below a row of teeth.

"Of course not," Remus Lupin cried, practically incredelous. "Wondering makes the world a better place. Why, what exactly are you wondering about?"

"Oh, just things..."

"These things wouldn't happen to be auburn haired and the object of our best friend's affection, would they?" A sly grin had spread across Remus's young yet aged face - a strange description that, though he used it frequently, Remus himself had yet to figure out.

Sirius glared daggers. His voice was low, practically raspy as he sneered, "I told him not to tell anyone about that!"

"Yes, well, you know Peter. He can't resist a good secret," Lemus replied cheerily. Turning away from his two-foot-long essay that he'd been tending to, he faced his friend with concerned interest. "Sirius... have you talked to James about it yet?"

The black-haired boy shook his head. "No, not yet," he said. "I didn't... I didn't really plan on it either. It's just best he didn't know." He shrugged. "You know how it goes: What a bloke don't know can't hurt him." His eyes shifted to the crackling fireplace. The blue flames entranced him for a while before he spoke again. "Besides, it's not as if anything's actually going to happen there. I mean, really Moony. Lily?"

"What about me?"

Sirius's eyes became large marbles. He spun around in his chair, quick as lightening, to face the girl. Locking eyes with her was too much, he decided. He turned his gaze to the table where Remus had previously sat, only to find the seat empty. Curious, and more than the slightest bit confused, he turned back to Lily, trying to figure out how she'd gotten there. He hadn't been staring at the fire for too long... had he? "Nothing," he said at last, "really, Lily, it's nothing."

"It didn't sound like nothing," Lily replied.

Her hair looked impeccably good today, Sirius noted. He liked it when she wore it like that, long and free. It accented her marvelous green eyes more, he thought. It made her look more... mysterious, more interesting. Not that she wasn't always interesting, he reminded himself. She always was, no matter how she wore her hair... or what robes she wore... or what she said - no, he had to stop this. He gave a firm, yet unnoticable, shake of his head before saying, "Really, Lily. It was nothing." He looked around again, this time a bit too animatedly. "Say... where is everyone?"

"Hogsmeade trip, remember?" Lily asked. "I'm surprised you're not there."

"I'm really not too keen on those trips," Sirius lied.

"Even today's? It's Saint Valentines Day," Lily said, "I thought you'd have someone to take."

Sirius gave a long sigh. "My mum didn't sign the papers this year."

Lily tilted her head to the side. She smiled sweetly. "Oh, I see. Do you mind if I sit here?"

"Not at all," Sirius told her, suddenly aware that she was so close.

She sat silently. They both shifted to comfortable positions before turning their collaborative attention to the flames. Sirius, however, found in terribly hard to concentrate on the lively fire, with Lily Evans sitting so close. He kept forcing himself to resist the urge to grab her hand, touch her cheek, stroke her hair... something, anything. It just wouldn't be right. James had claimed her, a long time ago, back in their second year. He'd announced his desire for her - though lately he'd turned to calling it love, which made it all the more worse. And so, Sirius stopped himself from falling weak to his urges. The two sat there in a dreadful tension.

"Sirius..." His name was said softly, warmly.

He turned to face her, his eyes wide, vulnerable. Her own gaze, he noticed, was the same. Before he could do anything, before he could fight back, he found himself leaning in for the kiss. Their lips met, hers soft and lucious, his smaller and nervous. She didn't seem to have been expecting it, yet she gave into it easily. Her arms worked their way to the typical position, resting at his shoulders. He slid his own hands to her waist, pulling her closer as his tongue slipped between her lips.

Her own tongue met his. Unable to resist, a small game of tag ensued. Where Sirius's tongue went, Lily's followed. It took a few moments for Lily to get her way. Finally, she managed to have her tongue sliding down his throat, her hands now holding his soft face. He let out a soft moan as she shifted her body, now sitting in his lap. Her hands moved from his face to his shoulders again, then slowly to his chest, then the hem of his shirt. (Sirius noted with slight displeasure that she wanted to be in control, but didn't complain.)

His mouth found her neck as she worked his shirt off. Once he was freed of his cotton prison, he took the opportunity to regain some control, pushing her playfully into a laying position. This time, his hands worked to unbutton her blouse as she feverishly kissed his neck. Their lips met again once they were both shirtless. Her skin felt perfect against his, he noticed, yet something was in the way. His hands slowly came down to unhook her bra.

Her tits were gorgeous, he decided. Perfect, small, round, perky. He let his hands explore them, squeeze them, pleasure them, as his mouth remained occupied. He felt himself grow hard, then harder still as her hands slipped below his waist, struggling with his zipper.

She was freed of her pants as soon as he was freed of his. Her hands took a moment to explore his lower stomach, his ticklish spot. Finally, they pulled down his boxers, rubbing the inside of his thigh. He moaned again as she finally touched the very tip of his erection.

"You like that," she said, her voice hoarse, raspy, deep.

"I like that," he agreed in the same tone.

"Do you like this?" she wondered, as her hands slowly made their way to his balls. She played with them for a few moments before moaning herself as his hips pushed into hers. "I want you..." she told him. "I want you very badly."

He didn't need any more assurance. It took the slightest moment of her vulnerability to slide inside, making her groan, moan, pant, sweat. He started carefully, slowly pulling himself to where he was just barely in, then slowly sliding back inside her. Lily's hands gripped the bare skin on his back.

"More. Harder. Faster. _More!_"

He pushed - or, rather, shoved - himself inside of her at that. She screamed, a piercing scream, as she came at last. Relieved, he did the same. He'd been holding out for her, but the way she'd been fondling his buttocks... it was just too much.

They lay there in silence for a few moments, still connected.

"Sirius." This time, it was not lustful or caring. Her tone was awkward.

"Lily." His voice matched hers, oddly enough.

"I'm, er, I'm glad we got that out."

"Yeah," Sirius agreed, sliding out of her. "Out of our systems. Quickly, too. That's good."

"Very."

"Well." He stood, grabbing his shirt from across the room, retrieving his pants. "I'm... eh... glad I figured that one out."

"Figured what out?" Lily asked, still sprawled across the couch, quite naked.

Sirius didn't reply; instead, he just looked at her. The sight of her, nipples hard, legs warm and wet, hair spread out like a cloud, still made him hard. Yet, his erection was joined with another thing - nausea. This was his _best mate's_ meat. He didn't need her, he didn't really even need her. As they stayed there, naked in the common room, he realized exactly why he'd wanted her so badly: because he couldn't have her. And now that's he could - now that he _had_ - it didn't make it seem as fun anymore.

"Just things," Sirius said at last. "Things I'd been wondering about."

"Oh." She smiled as he clothed himself and turned away. "Wait... Sirius?"

He turned around slowly. "Yeah?"

"Happy Valentines Day."


End file.
